It’s a funny thing that mothers can’t put on their job description: “Stay-at-home mom between June ’05 through December ’07.” I’d get a kick out of watching the employer’s face if any of them wrote down on their J.D: “Amongst my qualifications, I have a degree in itch & scratch healing. I am a certified bottom cleaner, storyteller & snack improviser. I have a masters in boogie wiping & a PhD in cooking & bathing. I am a chef, a judge, a chauffeur, a maid, a shrink, a friend, a daughter, a wife. AND I AM MOM!”
If only employers knew how much experience, maturity, patience, perfecting the art of multitasking, etc. does a woman gather through all those months they spend taking care of their children, not to mention all the hard work it involves. All this, I’m sure could be worth A LOT in the business world. Too bad that it’s not taken into consideration. And yes, I am talking about graduate degree mothers with/without further education. Surely, the reward of staying home with one’s own children (at least for a while) has no quantitative value, the rewards will fully be reaped further in life.
The basic needs a child has are : LOVE, FOOD, SHELTER, CLOTHING, EDUCATION & YOUR TIME. It seems obvious, but the fact is we tend to complicate things for them & think that they need more than what we are actually giving them. Let’s keep it simple when they are still young. Complications will arise later on. Indeed they will.
I downright understand when a mother can’t stay at home taking care of her young ones because she has to work to make ends meet. In this economy this is actually the norm rather than the exception. I bow to the ones who can fully fulfill their duties as working women, mothers & wives. I need to sit down & take notes from them. Wow. Juggling between a full career & responsible motherhood is NO EASY TASK. A mother’s desicions are never easy because she has to think for her & her child’s sake, which sometimes happen to contradict. What to do? by all means, if you can’t use your head, use your knees & ask God!
That said, to me being a wife & a mommy is the next best thing that has ever happened to me. Sounds cliché. But it´s true. In case you are wondering, being God’s child is my first.
“Sometimes when you pick up your child you can feel the map of your own bones beneath your hands, or smell the scent of your skin in his neck. This is the most extraordinary thing about motherhood- finding a piece of yourself separate & apart that all the same you could not live without”- Jodi Picoult
I totally get when a person comes up to me & says : “I don’t ever want to have kids”… before gasping out the words “you’ve no idea what you’ll be missing”, I can’t help but start thinking on all the things being a mother/father entails & come to the conclusion (but never blurt it out loud) that yes, they will shun away a lot of pain when their kids get sick, they will probably know what a sleepless night means but never eight, nine or maybe ten months in a row (or more), the feeling of being painfully jaded after never ending days of curiosity & playfulness, they will never really understand the pain of a mother (or father) loosing their child… but they will never make out how does an “I love you mommy/daddy” sounds like to a parent’s ear, they will never get to be a real life superhero (to their kids), they will never get all the seemingly senseless fuss of a graduation, they will never understand the unexplainable feeling of joy when being hugged by their own children, etc. the list is endless.
Yes, being a mother is, I believe, the toughest job out there, but at the same time, it is by far the most rewarding… without ever earning a cent for it.
Between motherhood & sanity, I choose motherhood, nothing could be more sane!
“There is no way to be a perfect mother & a million ways to be a good one”- Jill Churchill